The Voice Within : My Battle Scars and Spirituality 8-27-16

The Voice Within : My Battle Scars and Spirituality 8-27-16: The Voice Within came about when I had to take a look at my life. It was like opening Pandora box. What I found has deeply affected my l...

My Battle Scars and Spirituality 8-27-16

My Battle Scars and Spirituality 8-27-16

The Voice Within came about when I had to take a look at my life. It was like opening Pandora box. What I found has deeply affected my life and continues to this day. See I can remember saying to myself when I very small that it was not supposed to be this way. I often wonder why my parents were angry and fighting about things that I had no true understanding about. It seemed that there were always problems and that my father was always in a rage. I remember thinking that if I was my mother I would not put up with it and leave my father.

Understandably, I understand my mother choices for she had three small children and two more, later on. Mostly she made the choice out of fear. Fear has a way making you think that you have no choices when you do. Living with my father was like walking on eggs shells, you never knew what was coming at you. He was fine one minute and angrier the next. Her fear kept her from protecting us and protecting herself. What she didn’t say was felt until I realized that I had to live up to expectations that no child should have to live up. You try and be the perfect daughter or caretaker to keep the harmony and to feel safe in a home that completely out of balance. Now I don’t if was all this way because I had my own trauma at age 5 for being flashed on the way to school which took me 30 plus years to re-dress and understand that it was not my fault. And that person involved in this situation, may have encounter similar situation. I don’t agree with what happen but have found forgiveness to bring myself peace.

          I did a lot thing to keep myself safe. I kept quiet and did things to keep myself safe in the face of a lot, of having  no voice within my own home, or feeling safe to be heard in my home that you were seen, not heard and sometimes not even seen as a person. My mother lack of voice to speak up has created multiple problems in own relationships, because she never felt heard or listen, help create a passive quality in me to not be heard or even have a voice when I need to really needed to see what was happen to me and in my own life. I was unconscious to the fact that I was recreating my childhood in my adult life. I wanted one thing or another, from the relationship that I was not getting it but a lot crap instead. 

I could not see the flags because I was raised to denied that they existed. It was until 2004 that I decide to look at why I getting myself into these toxic relationships. And it started with one book on Co-depend relationship and then children of alcoholic, all the while I would have these dreams of events or see things that I could not even explain to myself. I would have these dreams like I was in them and see the smallest detail and watch it play out like a movie or a vision in plain daylight. I then realized that I had a connection to them. I knew the people in them or they would be stand-ins for people I did not know. I either had a direct connection to or knew them because I lived near them. The hardest part is how to do you tell someone that you witness them in an accident or that you were in their house during dream time and can draw or even give an account of details that I could not possibly know.

 I now know these were the trigger for me to remember. I started with books like Sylvia Brown and just kept moving onto the next one. At which point I realized that this is what I had been experiencing my whole life and just figured everyone had the same visions and experiences that I did. And did not talk about it because it made people  uncomfortable because that is what I was taught. Along this journey in the known or unknown my life was falling apart in a way that I could not even think of. And people perceived it a witchcraft or devil work, and religion has a huge say in it. Or how dare I ask about the spirit standing on the side of the road or at the side of my bed at age 3-4. Or the car that is sinking in the Neshaminy creek that no one else saw. 

Even now 40 plus later people still have this sense of woo-woo around people who have these natural gifts and by all means, it can be a curse and a blessing. It bad enough that we treat each other with absolute disgrace because we can’t see ourselves alike or be kind to a person who may be different than us. It’s easier to objectify another for differences than find things in common.  It been twelve years since I first open that book and it has not stopped or gone away and I continue to learn things every day. I do know that everyone is gifted in some way or another, but it takes work and honest look into your past for crumbles that your soul left for you. It is not for the faint of heart, because if you want to know the truth, you need to be open to the possibility of life not being what you think it is or that you help to create your journey. And sometimes things that happen to you, that make no sense, may help you to connect the dots later on down the road. Just like I left crumb or memories for me to remember 30 years later.

I would go into more detail about what I experienced more, but at the moment I trying to detach from someone who was part of these 12 years of experiences and either hell bend on destroying me or keep pushing me to speak up for myself for the first time. I have since walked away from most of my friends and family because I didn’t want to blame anymore, or be their scapegoat or told that I killed someone because they can deal with their own life, that they created. Or deal with grief from death that someone chose to take drugs or alcohol, or commit suicide instead of taking responsibility for their selves. We're taught to blame things on people, events and our story about our life experiences, but we are the creator of life and our story. It’s up to decide how it ends. ©

The Voice Within : My life as spirit in Human Form – 8/24/16 Entry tw...

The Voice Within : My life as spirit in Human Form – 8/24/16 Entry tw...: When I explain what I see, these are my experiences. Every Medium, Channel or Intuitive see things different. I don’t use tarot cards; I...

My life as spirit in Human Form – 8/24/16 Entry two- Posted 82916

My life as spirit in Human Form – 8/24/16 

Entry two- Posted 82916When I explain what I see, these are my experiences. Every Medium, Channel or Intuitive see things different. I don’t use tarot cards; I do use a pendulum when I need answers to my own questions. People tend to think that having this gift we have all the answers in life, the truth we only get the information that given to by your own spirit families, guides or if there is some type of connection, be it a friend or animal, object. My own gifts, I did not explore until my thirty’s, and that when it really made its present really known.

We are all born with these gifts in different ways, some are here to help heal, the planet, the animals and of course people. Some work with plants, trees, water and air. Others are here to create new systems that work with all people. See you are not just a person in a body, you have many layer to you. You have what called an energetic body’s that surround you, beside a whole light body of yourself within you. And whether you believe it, or not you chose to come here to break down outdated platform on the planet.

Now, it can be a simple as just being nice to people or as big as you can image. I often ask people what did you want to do when you were five and some can remember and are not too off from it and most don’t remember. See when you want to be a fireman and you are working as EMS or in the field of helping people you not so far off from being serve to others. If you wanted to be chef and you are working at a diner in the kitchen, it’s only few steps to being that chef or owning your own business. There tends to be this rush to complete things faster and smarter. To make more and more money; while our passions seem to fall by the waist side making people less happy.

So this brings me to what I experienced, there is so many of them I try to keep in some type of order, but maybe guided to bring them up from memory as fit. I remember being in high school and knowing that someone was ill and had been out for a few days. I would not say I was good friends with this person, nonetheless; I did have classes with her. I remember giving a get well card to her because she had news that could affect her life and future. Which was actual wrong information that the doctors had told her. Now I did not know what was said to her but it was not true. Just image have been told that you could have problems for the rest of your life by a doctor that have no real training of the mind, of food choices and how things happen in the body as you mature from child to adult, as well as physical chemical of body working as whole and not individual parts. I remember writing sorry and hope that you’re feeling better to cheer this person up and since that time I know that what was said to her was wrong and proven wrong.

There was another time when you thinking your dating someone and as stupid teenagers do. I broke it off with someone because something was off, I did know what it was exactly but got a bad feeling. One of my friends begin seeing this person and I told her that he was not who he was claiming to be. She told me I jealous because he like her over me and that kinda where the friendship ended. Looking back, I don’t think I could have said anything differently, she chose to pursue the relationship and I know that it was harder then it needed to be.

Sometimes we are told things by friends, family or our own gut but choose not to listen, because where to taught to listen to what our body is telling us. Have you never met someone and you knew that something was off and could not put your finger on it! That is your intuition, energy body feeling the other person vibration and they are flags to investigate or walk away, because all is not what it seems. We’re not taught this because most of parents were taught to listen to their self-first.  If you think back with you were a child, there would times when you would react to people without even talking to them. 

See we are all telepathic to people and their energy or vibration and can pick up things outside of the normal senses. Again it not taught and your left to think what was that or dismiss it all together. Or if you had a broken bone or injury you know what the weather is going to be, because you whole body feels it. The body is a human barometer to the energy of people, places and things. Here is a thought just to show you what I mean, think of place that you don’t like to go or you enjoy, what does it feel like. The smells, the people, what is around you. Actually feel it!  Does it have color or make you uncomfortable. Is it playing on a fear that you have or is engaging you to really see what is around you. When you go somewhere, anywhere really engage in what is around you. That is my tip for the day. ©

The Voice Within : 8-27-16 My Dreams were High Jacked

The Voice Within : 8-27-16 My Dreams were High Jacked: Did you ever feel like your life that you dream about or have was Highjacked, I remember dreaming about my life and what it would look lik...

8-27-16 My Dreams were High Jacked

Did you ever feel like your life that you dream about or have was Highjacked, I remember dreaming about my life and what it would look like around age 9 or 10. I had a plan, even if was a dream at the time. These were my goals in life. The plan was simple or at least I thought so. It would take me another 30 years to realize that what was possible required me to give up much of who I was. That I would be not living the dream, but be enslaved by the crap people throw at you. See as early as elementary school we are compared to our peers and teachers.

We're taught that were not smart enough against other students because of a multitude of reasons. We're separated in groups for reading, writing and math. We're taught history that is invalid or completed flawed by another observation. Science is explained by a book with no real observation of the ecologic systems, as why it works and what causes things to change.Our school systems have become about memorizing data versus processing and understanding our part with it. God forbid you question something that your teacher could not respond too. Your cast out for even challenging the notion that your teacher or the books are wrong. I know because I have experience it when I read and heard something. Then told as child and as adult that I was wrong, even when I had nothing to compare it too, long before computers were everywhere for use. Thankfully, we have computer even though we have to dig around for corrected information. We take what anyone one person says and then claim it as truth, because it’s been taught to us, so it must be so. There no thinking anymore, it more of a brain washing us to conform to what other dictate to us.

Even now on the news, or elections or basically anything on the television, computer or cell phones the information that we received is questionable. You have no idea who or what is telling the truth. Recently, I have been questioning the weather and times of day, when I realized that it’s the middle of August and it getting dark at eight o’clock. Now when I was growing up the last thing you thought about was the time during the day. You know that August was hottest of all the months and it did get dark until around 9. Now it could be in the 30’s in November and 70 in March. The trees are losing leaves, due to lack of water and inconsistent weather changes. You see streams of planes spraying chemicals in the air and wondering your allergy are acting up when it’s not a change in seasons.

 It as if blindly walking around and not questioning what is around or before us. We have homelessness and people struggling to put food on the table and pay their bills. When we send jobs overseas and our government shut down because they don’t want to work together, or anyone can walk to food store and purchase verses forging over 100-200 years ago. And we have people who think why should they people help other out, because they work and others should too. Yet, because of our ego as human we allow these things to go on. We blame others for not having a birth right to be here as citizens, yet most of our ancestor came from somewhere else. 

We have become entitled and endow by not even know our family history or history alone, about what our families and ancestors did so we could live the way we to now and that we have the ability to fix many of the problems that face the planet, people. The things stopping us is us stroking our ego and money or the focus of money, government rules and laws, educating our self about our beliefs and were they came from.  Now I am no rocket science but it does not cost 30k to build a car, or 400-500k to build a home, 135.00 for a pill in the hospital for headache, or that food should chemical altered or engineer to feed the masses, yet we have people living on the street by choice or not and feeding people must be a birth right depending on your social status. 

Because if you have not looked around in a while the Jones have become Kardashians, Corporations, government and people playing/praying for you to stay asleep. The news once you too be afraid of people and actually living a life that you could possible dream for yourself or anyone. If you think back what you learned in kindergarten, about caring, sharing and being the best possible you are you living up to that expectation of you. It’s like you’re driving on the road and you think you the only person on the road trying to get somewhere, even when you can see the cars before you, behind you and to the side of you and keep riding someone ass of their car, all because you need to get somewhere; then get upset when traffic is moving. 

We have become so busy doing that were not being.  Do you know that there is 324 million people is United states to date and 7.3 billion on the planet, that if you took One dollar from each person either on the planet or any country you could buy out a major corporation or change the government, because we all know that debt in the trillions and being misuse to create wars, control other countries for their resources and land, enslaving us to be use for their debt of misuse and countless elected people who are to be of service to the people and their pockets. Now some may read this and say what can I do about it, I am not the government, banking system, big corporations or anyone for the fact, or I don’t have time or money to change anything. It takes just a thought, in is this life that I signed up for, is this the life I want my children, grandchildren or future generations.

 Have I become a dollar sign for other people to run my life tell me what to think and believe, how I chose to live or children chose to live and if you think it’s going to change with the next president, here a news flash it is fixed and you just think you have a vote that counts!  There is only one way for it to change, it’s you waking up and challenging what is before you or questioning why is this so, why is this happening or you taking a good honest look at yourself and say am I really a person who believes in the goodness/godness of another, because regardless what you know we are all people on this planet that we call home.  

http://www.census.gov/popclock/

My life as Spirit in Human Form 8-22-16

My life as Spirit in Human Form 8-22-16

Entry One

The last few days I have been thinking about all my experience and explaining what I see in the world daily or even over the years. Now, there are so many experiences. I just don’t know where to begin. See I found through the last 10 years of research into paranormal, philosophy, religion, healing modally, reading, lectures and then some. That you can only get so much information and experiences that other people have also experienced. So because I had so many, I thought it would a good idea to write them down because I know that most people are experiencing these same things, but don’t know what to do with them.

One of the first memories was when I was really sick. I am not sure what I was sick from, I had a woman appear at the side of my bulk-bed. I could have been no more five years old. I say this because I shared a room with my sister and I seem to have blanks in memory and time gaps of events. I remember dreaming about a baby being left in a small wooded area near a church by my house. When I lived at my parent’s home and was old enough to cross the main street that went by our section/ development I would go look for the exact spot that I have seen this baby left in, even years later I would look for confirmation of this vision. I seem to be trying to confirm that I really saw what I did. Now I did not tell anyone because, when I did, I was told that it was really there or I did not know what I talking about. Also, I learned really early that people did not see the things that I did. I did not know that people could not see what I seeing. So as a small child I would just take in what I saw whether it was a dream or actually vision, I just did not know what to do with the information.

I did write a book but have yet to edit and proof it. I wrote the book in 4 days and just needed to put the information down on paper, out of my mind. It does not go into all the experiences, only but a few. I also remembering that the neighbor was going to move and that there were issues at the house that they lived in. I don’t know what the issues are, even to this day. I remember saying something to my mother and her saying to me that it was not true. I did not know this at the time but the neighbor was one of my mother’s best friends. Well, they did move and the new neighbors moved in and had the same issues until they separated and one of them continues to live there to this day and tends to not be a very nice person.

I also had problems in school learning to read sounds of a, e, i, o and u. I struggle spelling words based on long and short sound. To this day I still struggle to spell words or miss words in basic sentence structure and English is not my favorite choice by any means.  So it’s kinda strange that I now spend a great deal of time writing and it’s now become my life. And as many people spend time reading this I encourage you really think about what you may have dreamed or physical seen that you may not have spoken about.

By all counts, they get stranger, freakier and scary at times. So this is my life and now I sharing it, so other people don’t think they are losing it. These are gifts and up to you to fit out how to help humanity. ©

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The Voice Within : Conversation with the Guides: 8/8/2016

The Voice Within : Conversation with the Guides: 8/8/2016: What if today you had to answer for all your pain, suffering that you caused in the world, all the negative thoughts and words that you ...

Conversation with the Guides: 8/8/2016

Conversation with the Guides: 8/8/2016

What if today you had to answer for all your pain, suffering that you caused in the world, all the negative thoughts and words that you created because someone else hurt you. Would you amend those sorrows that you created for another – would you look into their eyes and truly tell them you were sorry for the scar that you caused them. Would you be able to hold unconditional love and light, that all souls are? Would you be able to feel so deeply into your soul those feeling and emotions that caused another to walk a different path? What if, you were the god placed before them and chose your words that deemed them insignificant in world that you all have created. The divinity is within and not one among you is greater than another. That you came here, now to remember that all walk the same path to remember the spark of creation. To remember the Master’s that you are. You have chosen this life time to throw out the dogma of separation and stand as powerful creator and own who you are.

You are not what you have been told. You are not just humans in form. Your vessel is not just your body and mind. You come from a magnificence of the universe. You have been taught to see separation and that your powerless to create a difference in a world that would entrap you to think that because you came from a situation of less than ideal, that you deserve less. What of your fellow man/woman do they deserve less than you? You are separate because that is chose to forget, who you are. You chose your stories and how they would play-out. You were taught darkness, hate and separation, what is perceived as good and evil, as what is ugly, that your smart or dumb on a program that was designed by whom! You have lived my life times to be right here and now. Yesterday is gone and tomorrow is a projections of possibilities. You have chosen now to be the brilliant being that you are, there no mistakes in that!

Only you can decide what is truth for you. Somewhere with you, lies the knowledge and keys for the truth. You have played the games and programs, well, as they were written and imposed a pond you. Now it time to remember and wake up from the illusion that was created, from so much of polarity on your planet that you call home. Unequally, exists because you have allowed it to become truth, no one should be kneeing before anyone, you are all souls of the light in form. You chose now to waken to the truth. You must make a conscious decision to awaken, no-one can make that choice for you. You must follow your hearts to the realizations of the truth. Some part of you knows and it pulls at you, when see destruction a pond your planet, one some level you have agreed to tear down those lies of that have been weaved to reality.   

The truth of who you are is within, not in the illusion. May would say how is it illusion? If I can see it, as so. You have not learned to not see it as anything other than it is. You only learned to expand, what you have been taught. What if you changed the view- on everything? This vessel, as well others that we speak through came in with many of the same challenges that most encounter, but have agreed and have memories that they could not explained to another, had they would have been labeled as such, you tend to label things that you do not understand or even bother to question. It seems to past from one generation to next. And really have you ever bother to seek the answers out for yourself. Other than what you are told, what do you really know about the soul or your spirit! Is it taught at schools, in your homes, or in your family! How do you really know, who you are? If you/yourself have never challenged your own beliefs of who you are! How would you even begin to explain to a child that they are manifested spirit in form of body, mind. That you can create whatever you want! And that you create with love of all people, animals, the planet and that serves the greater good of all.

To most this seems a fanciful idea and concept. Yet, it not taught on level that is greatly accepted. Are you taught about the builder, achiever, and the good going on in the world! You have what you have, because you were taught for hundreds of years. You are not taught about the people who stood in their truth, even your nightly news reflects what world you live in! You see what you see, because people want you to see it as so. Fear control the mind and love does not, it expanses your view. How many events need to play-out before you see your fears are creating the very world you inhabit.  Really, think about this what you fear, create more of the same response. Challenge your fears, challenge your beliefs, be like children again and do it anyway. So what! Maybe you will change your view.

The Voice Within : The Empathetic You 8-2-16

The Voice Within : The Empathetic You 8-2-16: The Empathetic You 8-2-16 Taking care of the empathetic you. As children we learned many lessons that did not necessary take care for ...

The Empathetic You 8-2-16

The Empathetic You 8-2-16

Taking care of the empathetic you. As children we learned many lessons that did not necessary take care for us. As small children when we were asked to meet people. we would sometimes cling to our parents or hide because we sense things about people, places and all sorts of things. Then we be forced to speak to someone or greet what was presented to us. This causes more fears, then acceptance of what is or was at the time. Did you ever go to the store and watch some children as there being pushed in the shopping cart or brought into a store full of people, these children or now adults people become overwhelmed, or start emotionally breaking down.

These children are freaking out by the sheer amount of energy that they feeling from people. This can happen in store, playgrounds, schools, the doctor’s or dental offices and pretty much anywhere there is a high volume of people or energy that creates fear, pain or unfocused energy. Children our beacon of light. They are not choosing to have melt-down because they want too. There are feeling their way in the world that relies on words verses feeling emotions to understand their world around them. Many of these people or children get labels of being too sensitive or overly active because we don’t understand them. And as parents we think that they are just acting out because were trying to accomplish something that needs to be taking care of. These children are high sensitive and acceptable to process food, chemical that are in clothing and just about anything that is not natural.

Instead of forcing these children to do things that overwhelmed them. You need to find ways to support them through the stress of what their feeling. Try to think like them, if possible and see the world through them. Go to the store at different time or days to avoid them acting up or stressing yourself out because we live in a world that want us to be robots and comply to some crazy social status, as child should be seen but not heard. Remove process foods from their diets and if there really picky then feed them their favorite meal, until ready to change and try other food. Change what you can, food, clothing, go chemical free use natural products, change the times that you go places and do things in your life. Take short trips for vacation or stop to make more trips out into nature. Talk or watch your children reactions. Who knows you may realize that they were once you and you now understand why you react the way you do, because someone once wanted to change who you are to fit in.  

“The more you open to see their world around you, the more open you are to see the world around you”.