II have written about working through the trauma. The trauma is not all mine. The trauma is about how I have met countless women who were sexually assaulted as a child or the even in their teens. And then to meet women who have their children taken by the courts by the men that assaulted them physically or who cheated on them, then left them, took the children via the court system, and when off to make a new family. Which is part of my own story too.
For these mothers being treated by the system as criminals, or perpetrators in many of these situations. Or the women who I met who by honoring that "marriage Vow" of "death due us part", stay with men that either physically or mentally abused them, while their children were either locked in a closet, or sleeping, not home, and that the men came home from the bar or work, drunk or on drugs.
And all these men are from all walks of life from the laborer to high-paying lawyers and up, and To do these things to people they supposedly love. That is not Love. Like the vow of marriage is used as some kind of ownership over, like a piece of property. When you are asking for God's blessing, to consecrate it, to then be mentally, sexually, and physically abused. If you don't think that your children know, please rethink that thought, because they may not say anything or not know all of it, but they know something is off.
So, when I would encounter these women, I would ask the guides why am I experiencing this and how am I supposed to help them. The court, systems, and these Judges create conditions that leave little or unreal conditions for these mothers to have a close relationship with their children or make other sacrifices because their no blood drawn, and by the court's view, no harm has been done because of lack of Leaving no physical proof. (I am not talking about the mother who is the abuser, drunk, drugs in the opposite position of this scenario) because there are both women and men.
These are about women that I encountered. If the women are able to free themselves from these men, the same court system forces them to give out personal information that leaving in a position to be assaulted with even just being in the appearance of the person gives them anxiety and opens the door for these men to show up at work and an event, like myself the person jumped in front of my car in the parking lot, while I still driving the vehicle.
Then there is the trauma to the children in these incidents and what I witness by being a bystander, on the bus, in the store, or my travels, or of being in a shelter, and the effect on my children separated by the courts. These children are left alone, locked out of apartments, left in cars, or even just not being fed by parents and caretakers.
Crying in the silence of being hungry or left alone, or even ill. Children are left to fend for themselves, without the slightest idea of "Parents" of what they doing to their children. Wondering how is it, and the effect on my life and these other people, that this keeps happening from my childhood to the present day. Where is the focus and what is the bigger picture of all this playing out?
So, knowing that I did not have loving and supportive relationships with my parents, they may have thought that they were. I was always fed and provided the basic needs, but there was a lack of general concerns for my mental well-being, emotional support, and physical needs. So when I encountered these women and raised the question of why I am experiencing this when I am clearly still working through my own experience of the trauma of what had happened. I did not know what to say to them to ease the pain that they were experiencing, because much like them, I did not have the answers and still don't to this day. As to why I experience these horrific things.
These women mirrored the very things that I encountered in my life and I have had to dive deep into my memories of what my life was like as a child to now. As for my intuition as a child it was there but not with the alarm bells or red flags that should have gone up. I don't know if it is I was told not to speak of it or if I was so conditioned by the events in my life that I just did not listen completely. After all, I did not know what I was feeling, and I did not understand what was happening, because I was taught that we don't speak of these things, I just ignored the signs.
People tend to think that intuition is instant knowledge with big fireworks. It is not. Sometimes it is so clear that it is in your face. Intuition is subtle and quiet and feeling into it. As a child or even as a teen, you only know what you are exposed to in your environment. As an adult, you have a greater awareness either by experiences or by the knowledge and wisdom that you seek or gained along the way. It is likening intuition to being hyper-aware. If that is even a word. I have not figured out if I came in this way or if it is from my childhood that the empathic part of me picks up the energy and emotions around people, not being trained to understand whether it is my energy or someone else. (which I still walk into today). I will explain below.
Intuition is referred to as Psychic Clair's- seeing, smelling, hearing, knowing, tasting, emotions, and feeling (touch) and also includes animals and the environment. It is my understanding that there are more that have not been discovered, as of yet. These abilities roll into mediumship and channeling. Some may call themselves channels, but the channels I refer to are people, who can speak and hear the Angels, being from other star systems and different groups of beings. Mediums generally deal with loved ones that cross over or connect to someone that you may have known like a friend that assists with bringing that person through to you. Intuitive and psychic are interchangeable to a degree. Intuitive generally can bring more precise examples from the guides through. Some may disagree with what was just explained, but this is my point of view.
From above (which I walk into today ) All these abilities deal with the senses. Normally if one of the senses is missing (hearing, seeing, taste, smell..etc) one of or all other senses will be heightened. Much like animals that use their natural abilities to know when you have walked in the door or the wild when to seek protection for themselves from the elements. This is why you don't see animals in the wild during a thunderstorm, or tornado. Our own animals hide during a storm, it is instinctual to protect themselves. This is why children hide from people they know or don't know. Or They act out, other than for attention. This is why Children freak out in stores because they can feel what you or we have learned to ignore.
Children are like a sponge these absorb what is around them. Which why they then learn to block or to not pay attention to themselves, because of conditioning and they are taught to not listen to their own needs first. When parents are not in tune with themselves, you can't pick on the signs that children are saying without speaking, because we are not even listening even to yourself. Along with heightened emotions children and adults can enter a room, store, or event and experience the emotions and feelings left behind. I experience this if someone complains a lot and I entered the room I feel the energy of these emotions, of complaining, or anger, angry or happiness and when I leave I have to remember that it is not mine, or my energy. That is what is called an energy imprint in the environment. Now children don't the difference between their energy and parents, so they walk around picking other people's energy.
Just like when you are in kindergarten you are taught to be nice, share, and be kind, but can you be honest enough with yourself that every word that you utter is saying your that person? There is a Lesson with this too- we all know people who are not nice, kind, or even caring, or sharing people. That is the nature of being human. You can not have one without the other. We could have that, but every single person on the planet would have be that person from the beginning, and we don't live in that world, yet. We have had civilizations that have come close, but somehow or way, it never truly happens. I digressed.
If you tell or teach your children to be nice, and kind and to be caring and sharing, but you, yourself don't live those moral values, how is child/ren to what is truth? And add that they are psychic sponges to mix and no wonder people don't use their intuition or listen to themselves because parents teach one thing and speak the opposite. No moral judgment, because I am a walking talking person from these incidents myself. This leads me back to women and children and men ( I am not biased) If intuition is fully activated in people, people would not experience most of the things they have because they would already have an awareness that something is off, wrong, or not right.
So back to the women that I met and my upbringing, and the children. Conditioning comes from previous generations of history, society, media, and cultural values. Right now there is an upswing of spiritual growth on the planet. One reason for this is these children are bringing it through and there are enough adults questioning things that don't make sense to them. If I were to use my own life as an example the only way that I can speak and write about now is because I looked for the answers and questioned the questions. I asked the guides why in my own life, did I have the situations that I did and I was told because there were not enough open-minded people, so to understand the dynamics of human conditioning, many of us doing this work, came through with most difficult challenges. Not that other people's stories are less important, because there is no one single person better than another. We all came from God.
I will use the example that came to me this morning. Let's look at an extremely wealthy person and a modest means (poor) person. Wealth is said to bring life the greatest pleasure, but are they truly happy, now a poor person could have nothing and barely get by, but are they happy, or does not having wealth truly take away from their being happy and having true relationships? It is more likely, that a wealthy person with all their toys and pleasures, does not know true happiness or relationships, it is about money and materials matters, and keeping up with the appearance of such.
Now, a poor person knows their conditions and does the best that they can with what they have. Not that they don't want better conditions for themselves. Its mindset for perception * The meek shall inherit the earth.* because God comes first in the person's thoughts vs. the wealthy person. This is not to say that we should all aim for being poor because that is not what Jesus taught about abundance or most religious teaching, it does not say chasing money in pursuit of love, joy, and happiness.
So inclusion: When you are psychic, intuitive, medium, or channel - none of these things is taught from the beginning of life, (maybe if your monk, just humor not sure if it is taught there either) and it is a learning curve and no single people out there or me, can tell step by step through it. And beyond the trauma, there are still things that I have experienced that I still have questions about and I have found no reference to.
Part written and channeled
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